Well, we made it to Mexico! The trip down here was pretty uneventful. And considering I only got two hours of sleep the night before, it's pretty amazing that I even remember any of it. :-) Since we only had a few minutes to change planes in San Francisco, Kelly and I decided to make the trip with nothing but carry on luggage. We each brought a small suitcase (like flight attendants use) for clothes and one other small bag for money, tickets, magazines and such. It was so nice to not have to wait in the crowds at the baggage claim and be able to head right to customs when we arrived. Here in PV, to determine who is chosen for customs inspection, you have to press a button under what looks like a giant traffic signal. If it lights green, you get to go right through. If it's red, get ready to have your underwear fondled. A woman who was on the same flight as us went ahead of me and got a red light. I decided it served her right because she took her seat belt off within seconds of the pilot telling everyone to leave them on. I hate people who do that (just a small pet peeve). We then met up with the rep from our tour company. Our vacation package includes transportation to and from the airport as well as the hotel and airfare. Since they have other people who bought package deals going to other hotels, they make the most of it, pile all of us into one van and drop us off as they reach each of the hotels. We, of course, are at the hotel furthest from the airport and had the longest drive. Let me tell all of you who think that the people from your state are the worst drivers in the world - they're not. If you think that, you obviously have never been down here! It is quite scary. Everyone is in such a hurry and drives absolutely as fast as traffic will allow. And the roads here are awful. A lot of them are cobblestone. So, not only are you going at the speed of light, you're also on a road that looks like it's been bombed!

Eventually, we made it to the hotel in one piece. We're staying at Hotel Buenaventura. It's a Mexican owned and operated hotel that is only a few blocks from downtown. There are some big name hotels such as the Hilton and the Sheraton here, but they're much more expensive, a lot further away from "the action" and they lack the charm of this place. Before you even ask, they filter the water here themselves so it's perfectly safe to drink. They have security guards who patrol all the time so we feel very safe here. Plus, the waiters and other staff get to know your face really quickly and they look out for you too. We were pretty pooped by the time we got here. Yesterday in a nutshell: unpacked, went for a dip in the pool, early dinner, went to bed. Yup, I was in bed by about 6:30. Kelly went to the grocery store for some munchies and I was going to just take a nap until she got back. However, I was so tired (I only had two hours of sleep remember!) that I just couldn't wake up. I did wake up about 11:00 and read for a little while, but that was about it.

When I finally got up this morning, I was feeling much better. We had breakfast at the restaurant here in the hotel. They have an awesome breakfast buffet with lots of fresh fruit, pastries, cereal, eggs, meats, pancakes, french toast and omelets made to order. It's yummy! (Yes, that blur in the middle of the first picture is me returning from the buffet) We made a quick trip to the grocery store for some supplies for me and then hit the pools for the rest of the day. I got a little sunburned, but not too bad. Kelly, who got sunburned REALLY bad last year, wisely stayed in the shade. It was a very relaxing afternoon. We had dinner here at the hotel (roasted chicken - yum!). Kelly went swimming again after dinner while I sat in a lounge chair and started journaling. All in all, a pretty uneventful day. The weather's been okay. It's hotter than Hades, but it's always hot here. It's been overcast mostly. There was a huge thunder and lightning storm last night. The Mexican Weather Channel forecasted more TORMENTAS for today, but it didn't happen. It got cloudy, but no rain. Having clouds has actually been kind of nice. Even though it's still incredibly hot, the clouds keep it from being totally unbearable. Now, if we could only get a breeze going...

That's all I wrote while I was actually in Mexico. Sorry I didn't keep up with my journal more, but, hey! I was on vacation! :-) I will fill you in on the rest of my trip, but I will have to do it from memory. Bear with me.

Well, Part 1 got us through Thursday, Sept 30, in PV. As I said in my previous entry, Part 1 was all I wrote while in Mexico. The rest is being written as I make these pages. I did make a really rough outline of basically what we did each day so, hopefully, I won't forget too much.

We got up, showered and schlepped our way down to breakfast. And I mean schlepped in every sense of the word. The humidity was so high in PV that, even after a shower of nothing but cold water, we were sweating profusely in the time it took to towel off and put clothes on. It didn't help that the hotel bathrooms don't have fans in them. I found that the room (and in turn everything I brought down there) had developed quite a prominent mildew smell. So between not getting enough sleep and being sweaty like you read about, we most definitely were not skipping down to breakfast every morning.

Fortunately, breakfast was one of the best things down there. I've always loved a buffet, but a buffet of breakfast food is nirvana. I could have eggs and pancakes for every meal of the day. Pretty much every day I ate a huge breakfast at the hotel before we headed out to do whatever we had lined up for the day. That way, I really didn't need to eat another big meal until dinner time. Saved a lot of money that way. Kelly, on the other hand, found that she couldn't eat that much in the morning and usually order a la carte off the menu instead of having the buffet.

After breakfast, we took a taxi over to the Mercado which is the main marketplace in downtown PV near the Rio Cuale. Each of the vendors has a booth-like area in which to sell their wares. And, boy, are they packed in there. There isn't an inch of wasted space in that place. It's so crowded that we found it was cooler outside where it was like 95 degrees! Phew! The building has three floors with the majority of the third floor being a sort of food court. I guess it's PV's version of a mall. :-) There's all kinds of stuff for sale there from the obvious t-shirts, postcards and jewelry to leather belts and boots, luggage, glassware, pottery, ceramics, wood carvings, and the list goes on. It's pretty impressive.

Since I went crazy shopping on last year's trip, I decided that I was only going to buy a few t-shirts for Mr Moo and his parents. Kelly wasn't in too much of a gung-ho shopping mood either. We walked around the first floor until we nearly passed out from heat exhaustion, went to one other smaller shopping area across the way and then called it quits. Let me tell you, the novelty wears off really quick when you're thirsty. I did manage to pick up a few t-shirts and some postcards so I felt pretty good that I had accomplished something.

After returning to the hotel and racing to see who could get into the pool faster, we spent a pretty quiet afternoon lounging poolside. Since Kelly has very fair skin and is on medication that makes her even more sensitive to the sunlight, she spent pretty much the whole week in the bar/restaurant by the pool (under the blue roof in the first pic). I, on the other hand, basked like a lizard and swam a lot. Insert funny store here => Okay. Time for all of you to have a good laugh at my expense. Knowing I was going to PV at the end of the summer, I spent a lot of time outside gardening this summer trying to get a little bit of base tan. And pretty much, it worked. I had enough color on me that I really didn't burn at all. At least not on the parts of me that had color. See, I didn't exert a lot of brain cells thinking about the fact that areas like my upper arms, upper legs, chest and back were covered with a t-shirt and shorts all summer. So, once I laid out in the Mexican sun for a while, I got a little bit crispy.

Now comes the really funny part. I did think about it enough to put some heavy duty sunscreen on my shoulders because I knew that they would be exposed whether I was lying on my stomach or my back and would have a tendency to burn. So, I slathered on some Coppertone and called it good. Well, once I got back into the room and took a good look at myself, I realized the error of my ways. It turned out that everywhere on my shoulders and neck that I had put sunscreen were still as pale as before I went down there. My upper arms and chest that hadn't seen either any sun all summer or sunscreen that afternoon, were glowing red with sunburn. And the rest of my arms, which had gotten sun all summer, were nice and brown. I was three different colors!!! ACK! I looked like a weather map with different temperature zones! Being three different colors wasn't even the worst part. The worst part was that the topmost layer near my shoulders (which would correlate roughly to Minnesota and the northern Midwest of my "weather map") is an amorphous uneven shape that looks like I started putting on sunscreen and fell asleep before I could finish or something. Blargh!

Honestly, it wasn't that big of a deal to me because I knew it would all be covered up with clothing as soon as I got back. I just had to deal with a few strange looks whenever I was at the pool for the rest of the week. Not a big whoop. I did try to even it out a little while I was still there. I put super duper sunscreen on my arms and tried to get more color on my shoulders and neck. It worked pretty well except at the dividing line. The higher SPF stuff would leach upwards slightly due to sweating and swimming. So even though I did manage to get some color on my shoulders, I now have a nice bright ring around each arm. I know - I'm hopeless.

Since getting back, the burnt areas have peeled quite a bit so I'm almost all one color now. At least I'm not glowing anywhere anymore. I only have to live with it until the whole tan fades. Let's see, that should be sometime around MARCH! Aieeee!

That evening, we went out to eat at a restaurant called La Palapa (which refers to a type of thatched roof they use down there for cabanas and such). We walked to a small shop a block or so from the hotel in order to pick up some sandals that Kelly had custom made (incredibly cheap, I might add!) before hailing a taxi to take us to the restaurant. It was a nice cozy little place right on the beach. We sat down just as the sun was setting which was breathtaking. We started looking at our menus when Kelly suddenly looked up and we both had the same exact thought at the same exact time. She had left her bag of new shoes in the taxi! Any of you who have been to Mexico yourselves know what the chances are of getting something back after leaving it in a cab. For those of you who haven't, it's about a snowball's chance in hell. I felt terrible, but there really wasn't anything we could do. Kelly tried to shrug it off that the sandals weren't that expensive and went back to looking at the menu. Just as we finished ordering our meals, someone tapped Kelly on the shoulder. It was the taxi driver with her bag! What a miracle! Kelly was thrilled and gave the guy $5 US which in turn thrilled the taxi driver (it was more than what we paid for the cab fare!). So, everyone was happy and we enjoyed the rest of our meal. Kelly had some sort of shrimp and I had a piece of red snapper fish. Dinner was excellent, but the dessert was even better! I don't remember what it was called, but it was a pile of the most heavenly ice cream puffs (good thing I remembered my Lactaid!) with chocolate sauce that I have ever tasted. We decided that we should go back there every night, skip dinner and just have the dessert. :-) Unfortunately, we never did get back there, not even for the dessert.

After another bumpy and scary cab ride back to the hotel, we both collapsed in the room and turned in fairly early.

Saturday was (gratefully) a pretty uneventful day. I gorged myself at breakfast, as per usual, and we spent the day by the pool. I did stop into the hotel gift shop, bought myself a nightshirt and started my never ending quest for stamps to mail my postcards. Kelly got to the cashier first since I was looking at shirts and bought enough stamps for her postcards. However, that left only two stamps for my eleven postcards. The cashier told me to come back the next day and she would have more. I didn't think about until later, but the next day was Sunday and the gift shop wasn't even open. Since we ended up taking a bus tour on Monday that left before the gift shop opened, it wasn't until Monday night before I got the rest of my stamps and Tuesday before I could get the postcards in the mail. We kept joking that at the rate I was going, I should just carry them home and mail them from Portland!

For dinner that night we went to a restaurant right next door to the hotel called The Mission which specialized in steaks. Since summer time is off season in Mexico (October is considered shoulder season and November is full fledged "on" season) and there are a bazillion restaurants in PV, some of them just close for the summer rather spending the money to stay open when there are virtually no customers. Turns out the night we went to The Mission for dinner was only the second night they had been open since the end of last season. Unfortunately, this meant that some of the items on the menu (specifically, the garlic mashed potatoes and the chocolate mousse) weren't available yet. I was pretty bummed until our steaks arrived. They were absolutely positively the most delicious and tender steaks in the entire world. I swear you could have cut them with a fork. And the portions were huge! I ate about 2/3 of mine and thought I was going to explode. It was so good. Also, since they had just opened, we were, at one point, the only customers in there. This meant that we had the entire staff waiting on us. It was almost ridiculous. We had five waiters hovering over us when our food came. I hate to say it, but it was too much customer service! You definitely wouldn't ever see that happening in the US.

After dinner, we went back to the room, read for a while and went to bed. All in all a nice relaxing day.

Sunday turned out to be even more uneventful than Saturday for me. By that point, I had had enough sun that I didn't want to go back to the pool. After a late breakfast, I went back to the room and spent the afternoon reading and napping. Kelly spent the afternoon down by the pool. I did wander down there at one point to talk to Kelly about possibly doing a day trip or two with our remaining time in PV. We were both getting a little bored and needed to get out and do something.

While talking to Kelly, one of the beach vendors roamed by. In case you couldn't tell by the pictures, the hotel is right on the beach. The pool area is only a small stone wall away from the sand. So when you're laying by the pool or in the bar area, the beach vendors can walk right up to the wall and talk to you (the ever present security guards make sure that they stay on the beach side of the wall). You constantly hear "Good deals for you, Lady!" "Cheaper by the dozen!" "Come see. I have (fill in the blank)" They sell all kinds of stuff - blankets, clothing, LOTS of silver jewelry, woven bracelets with your name on them, wood carvings, kites, etc. Some of the vendors are even hawking services. One woman braided hair; others were selling trips and parasail rides. Kelly did cave in and had her hair braided on Thursday, I think. After she had been down there a while, I wandered over to see how it was going. I watched the woman braiding her hair. Boy, was she fast! I suppose you have to be if you're going to do a whole head of cornrows. What intrigued me the most, however, wasn't her technique, but her comb. I finally asked if I could look at it and sure enough, I was right. It was a green comb made by my uncle's company! What a small world. I wrote on my postcard to my aunt and uncle that if they ever went to PV, to make sure that they brought plenty of combs to sell! :-) Anyway, the beach vendor we talked to was selling real silver jewelry out of a large case. After feeling how heavy some of the pieces were, I imagine that case is pretty heavy. And he lugs it around in the sweltering heat from one hotel to another. Oy! Kelly picked out several pairs of earrings and I picked out something for Mom-In-Law (which I haven't given to her yet so I'm not going to say what it is in case she reads this). Kelly, the amazing haggler that she is, got us a really good deal on the whole purchase. That's one thing about traveling abroad that I will never like - haggling with everyone over prices. I'm American! I like price tags! :-)

Kelly and I met with our tour group representative at 5:00. Her name is Ute (oo-tah) and she's from Germany. Her accent was great. We signed up and paid for two tours: Monday to Mismaloya and Tuesday to San Blas.

We ate dinner that night at the hotel. It was BBQ night at the restaurant and they were featuring all sorts of grilled items. Kelly and I both had the grilled red snapper. What I didn't know ahead of time was that you got the WHOLE fish with this meal. The waiter put the plate in front me and there was this fish, head, eyes, tail and all. It was quite an experience since I had never had a fish like that. Kelly derived great amusement over my fretting over the fact that the fish was looking at me and I didn't know if I could eat it. Fortunately, I managed to peel the skin back and cover his face so I could eat. I was doing fine until I found a little white ball that looked like a piece of styrofoam. Kelly said it was probably just part of a fishing lure or something. I finished eating as much as I could and decided to do a little investigating. I turned my fish head over to see the other side and sure enough, I was right. The little white round thing was one of his eyeballs! Ewwwww!!! That was it. I was done. Check, please! Actually, I lie. We hit the dessert bar first. Then we asked for the check. :-)

Since we had to be up, showered, fed and ready to go by 9:00 the next morning, we turned in early.

I finally conceded the fact that it was my birthday and there was nothing I could do about it. Thankfully, Kelly realized how un-thrilled I was about it and didn't say much. Although we used the fact that it was my birthday to get some good deals on souvenirs later, mention of my birthday was blissfully absent all day.

The bus was scheduled to pick us up at 9:30 from the hotel lobby for the "Escape to Paradise" tour that we had signed up for on Sunday. We got up in time to shower and grab a quick breakfast before the bus arrived. After a few stops at some of the other hotels took pick up other tour takers, we were brought to the Harris Tours office parking lot where the split us up into our respective tour groups. We were relieved when we were instructed to get on a different almost empty bus for our tour since the bus that had picked us up was virtually full. Each bus held approximately 30-35 people. They weren't like the large tour buses you'd find in the US. For whatever reason, only about 10 of us had signed up for our particular tour, not that I was complaining! It meant that everyone got their own set of seats and could spread out as much as they wanted.

We set out for our first stop, Chino's Paradise, a small restaurant/scenic area set into the side of a river in the town of Mismaloya. The bus was air conditioned, thank goodness, and the seats were pretty comfortable. However, the combination of the its poor suspension and the horrible condition of the roads made for the most excruciating and nauseating bus ride I think I've ever taken. I nearly fell out of my seat numerous times after we hit some rather large potholes. It didn't take long before I was so bus sick that it was all I could do to keep my eyes closed and not throw up. I missed a lot of the scenery going by and points of interest, but at that point, I really didn't care.

We made one very short stop before Chino's Paradise at a scenic overlook. Apparently, this sand bar is where they shot some of the opening sequences of the film Predator starring Arnold Schwarzenegger. I haven't checked it out myself, but it's supposedly very early in the film where he's riding in a jeep. If anyone has the movie and recognizes this area in the film, let me know. After what seemed like an eternity of bouncing and bumping, we finally reached Chino's Paradise. It really wasn't anything to scream about as a restaurant, but the scenery was pretty and it was wonderful just to be off the bus. We stopped there just long enough to have a drink and stretch our legs. I immediately found a large rock to bask on and tried to get my stomach to calm down a bit. There were huge rocks everywhere around which the river flowed and created some pretty hefty waterfalls. I wish I had taken a few more pictures there, but I just wasn't feeling good. (Sorry about my hand in the first one. The sun was really causing a glare and I was trying to shade the camera lens.) Just when I was starting to feel almost human again, we had to get back on the bus. Our next stop was Chico's Paradise, another restaurant built into the side of a river (apparently a lucrative place to build a restaurant down there since all three places we visited were like that). Chico's Paradise and our final stop, El Eden, were well into the tropical rain forest in the mountains. Just when I thought the bus ride couldn't get any worse, we turned onto the road that would take us to the last two stops. Since it rains all summer in PV and the runoff from the mountain goes wherever it feels like it, the road up into the mountains was a mess. Forget that it was a narrow twisty-turny road that meander it's way up the mountain with sheer drops and no guard rails. The rain had been running all over the road all summer and there were huge potholes everywhere and large sections of road that were just gone. Bumpy doesn't even begin to describe it. Happy Birthday - BARF! Fortunately, I didn't actually throw up the whole day. I came close more than once, but I didn't.

Miraculously, we made it to Chico's Paradise without the bus plummeting off the mountain or the suspension completely going. There was a trail leading to the restaurant area which conveniently passed by several small gift shops. Also along the trail, there was a large fenced area with a murky puddle of water in it. Upon closer inspection, we discovered a crocodile living in it. Although the crocodile didn't seem to care, I was quite bothered by his pathetic living conditions. They aren't exactly "into" animal rights and anti-cruelty legislation in Mexico. Something that does and will continue to bother me. I saw a lot of what appeared to be starving dogs, cats, horses, and you-name-it while I was there. Although I inquired about water and shelter for the animals on more than one occasion, no one seemed to notice or care. :-( At the end of the trail, there was a bridge that took you over to the restaurant area, which was pretty nasty looking so I'm glad we didn't eat there. I have never seen a restaurant with so many levels. Since it was built into the hillside, they had to take advantage of footings wherever they could find them. There were at least a couple of tables on each level and they seemed to go on forever. I went ahead of the group and worked my way over to a second bridge closer to a gushing waterfall. I took a pic of the waterfall and one of Kelly standing on the first bridge. I was then yelled at to make it snappy because the bus was leaving. Our third and final stop for the day was the The Garden of Eden or El Eden, as the locals call it. Amazingly enough, it was a restaurant built into the side of a river! It was at this location where a majority of Predator was filmed. It is further up the mountain and river from Chico's and the road from Chico's onward was built just for the movie. I was really excited thinking I would be able to hike around and see locations from the movie, but it wasn't like that. Most of the movie set was "blown up and lit on fire" according to our tour guide, Eduardo. After the movie crew left, they leveled everything and built the restaurant. The only thing you are able to recognize from the movie is the burnt out helicopter they have mounted at the entrance. We had lunch first and then we were free to swim or explore. While we were eating, we were able to watch other people swimming in the river. They had erected a Tarzan rope for patrons to swing and leap into the river from. It was pretty amusing to watch since a lot of people had no idea what they were doing and kind of swung and FELL into the river. Also, the way the river flowed over one of the boulders had created a sort of natural water slide. After swimming across the river, you had to climb a ladder, crawl over the rocks and then you could slide down the slide. You can kind of see the slide in the first pic along with the final splash of someone who just jumped off the swing. After lunch I did go swimming for a little while. The water was really cold and refreshing. Since the hotel pool is in the sun all day it tends to be warm like bath water. This mountain river was COLD, but it felt great. After swimming, I checked out the nature trail I saw on the other side of the river. There were some ducks in a cage at the head of the trail and a really small but pretty waterfall a little ways in. Since I didn't have shoes on and there didn't seem to be much more to see than a lot of jungle, I was heading back to swim some more when an old man and some tourists came by. The old man asked if I had seen the monkey. Since our tour guide had told us more than once that there were no monkeys in that part of Mexico, I kind of looked at the guy like he was a little loco. In very broken English, he told me to follow along and we went on down the trail. Well, lo and behold, there was a spider monkey in a cage further down the trail. I had decided to turn back earlier just before I came into view of the cage. The old man had brought some bananas and allowed each of us to feed the monkey. It was fun, but again I was upset about how small his cage was and the fact that he was stuck living there. Apparently, he was originally chained in the middle of the restaurant as a tourist attraction. However, when he started to grow and mature, he started grabbing women's breasts and biting the men. That's when he was put into the cage. They tried to get him a female companion once, but he attacked her and they had to take her away. I guess he wasn't that interested. I kept telling myself that he was better off in the cage in the jungle than chained to the floor in the restaurant. But, I was still very upset as we walked away and left him all alone.

At some point, I did hike around outside the restaurant area a bit. Eduardo had told me that there was a trail that would take me way into the jungle and spit me out further up the river into a really scenic area. After walking a little ways, I finally saw the trail head and laughed. It was so incredibly steep, there was no way I was going to manage it considering I didn't have hiking boots, extra water or anyone to go with me. And I didn't want to be half a mile away when the rest of the group decided it was time to leave. Instead, I walked along the river a little and then went back into the restaurant. I went into the gift shop, picked up a Predator t-shirt for Mr Moo and went back down to the river. Most of the people in our group looked liked they were getting dressed and ready to head back to the bus so I did the same. I met up with Kelly on the bus where we fought alongside the driver to chase out a wasp that had gotten onto the bus. It wasn't long before everyone was on the bus and we were bouncing our way back to the hotel.

We survived the precarious drive back down the mountain and back to downtown Puerto Vallarta. The bus dropped us off right in front of the hotel which was very nice. As we made our way into the lobby, Kelly and I were discussing how quickly we could get our sweaty stinky selves into the pool. Just as we were approaching the elevator, I stopped dead in my tracks. I couldn't believe it. I had left our hotel key back at El Eden. I took the key out of my fanny pack in the gift shop when I was trying to get my money out. I had set it on the table and it got lost in the loads of jewelry they had spread out. And then as I was leaving El Eden, the girl from the gift shop approached me and said something to me. Her English was very poor and my Spanish is even worse so I didn't understand what she was saying. Looking back, I realize that she was trying to tell me about the key. If only she had just shown it to me! Had it just been the hotel key, it wouldn't have been a big deal because there is no charge for that key. However, the key to the safe in our room was in there and there was a $100 US charge for replacing that one. Argh! We got a replacement key for our room and Kelly headed up while I tried to explain our situation to the desk clerk. He let me use the phone to try and call El Eden to see if they could send the key back with another tour or something. Heck, I would have paid for them to send it in a cab! I was connected to an office that was a few blocks from the hotel. The woman who answered the phone spoke no English so the desk clerk spoke with her. Turns out that El Eden doesn't even have electricity or running water, never mind a phone. There was no way for me to contact them to ask them to hold on to the key or anything.

I trudged up to the room to dump my stuff and tried calling the tour company. Turns out that we were the last tour there for the day. I was screwed. I cleaned up a little, grabbed some cash and told Kelly that I would see her in a while. My only option at that point was to take a cab back to El Eden to get the key myself. Oh, did I mentioned that it was over half an hour's drive one way? Argh! I went downstairs and hailed a cab. Fortunately, the driver spoke very good English, understood what had happened and, more importantly, understood that he had to wait for me while I got the key so he could drive me back. Can you imagine if he dropped me off and left and I had been stranded up there? Oy. Fortunately, again, the ride was much less bumpy in the cab than on the bus. I didn't get nearly as sick the second time around. We talked a lot about him, where he lived, whether he owned his cab, if he'd ever been to the US. I told him that I had left my husband at home and was on vacation with my girlfriend. I realized, once I saw him staring at me in the rearview mirror, that his and my definition of "girlfriend" were two very different things! I quickly explained that she was just a friend and that I wasn't bi-sexual! I ended up learning more about PV and its people from the cab driver than the tour guide.

Much to my relief, the staff at El Eden still had my keys and were holding them at the bar. I gave the girl who had originally tried to tell me about them a couple of dollars for her trouble, even though I was too dense to understand what she was saying at the time. At least she had tried. Then it was back into the cab for the long drive back. The entire cab ride ended up costing me about $30 US but it was still cheaper than paying $100 US for the safe key.

I arrived back at the hotel from Mismaloya for the second time that day. I held up my keys for the guys at the front desk to see and they clapped. I went up to the room and pretty much collapsed on the bed. Kelly, sneaky little devil that she is, had brought a birthday present to PV for me and had it sitting out for when I got back. She said that although she understood that I didn't want to think about my birthday, that no one should go without at least one present on their birthday. She had taken a large tank top and, using fabric paints, stamped all kinds of cows and other little critters all over it. It was really cute and I wore it to the pool the few more times we made it down there. Kelly mentioned going out to eat and I told her to go without me. I was so tired and emotionally wiped that I just wanted to be alone. I ended my birthday exhausted, going to bed very early and without dinner.

After my double trips to Mismaloya on Monday, I really didn't feel like going anywhere on Tuesday. However, we had already pre-paid for the tour to San Blas so I forced myself out of bed. The bus was picking us up at 7:45am so we had to be up even earlier than the day before. Kelly got up, showered and went down to the lobby. I practically crawled into the shower because I was so tired. It's a good thing I had set out my clothes and stuff the night before because I didn't have much time to get ready. The tour included breakfast so I just needed to get myself dressed and downstairs which I did in just enough time.

Unlike the day before, this tour was packed. Kelly got on the bus before me and got the last seat on the bus all the way in the back row. I turned around and headed back up front. They cleared out the front two seats and I sat with a woman who turned out to be a tour guide in training. Although I was bummed that I wasn't able to sit with Kelly, I was incredibly grateful to sit in the front seat because it helps with the motion sickness.

Heading North, the tour guide talked incessantly about the countryside, the people, the plants, the animals and anything else he could think of. I was so tired that it didn't take much to block him out and doze. I found out later that, while I slipping into a self-induced coma, Kelly was having a hard time in the back. Apparently the speakers in the back didn't work well so they heard more static than the tour guide. Also, because she was in the very last seat in the back, Kelly had hot air from the engine blowing on her legs. There was a/c on this bus like the other one, but the hot air on her legs was totally overriding any benefit she was getting from the a/c.

Our first stop was a quick one at a gas station. They served juice, coffee and soft drinks to go with our boxed breakfasts. We stayed long enough for people to eat quickly, have a drink and use the potty. Our second stop was another quickie at a restaurant where we were going to have lunch later in the day. We stopped there long enough for everyone to place their lunch order and use the bathroom.

Back on the bus once more, we continued on towards San Blas. Unlike heading to Mismaloya the day before, the roads north of PV were much, much nicer. They were regular paved roads that didn't have more than a few little potholes. I was so happy. We saw a lot of plantations growing things such as bananas, pineapples, a large very weird looking thing called a Jack fruit, mangoes, papaya and tobacco. The road came close to the coast on a couple of occasions and we got spectacular views of the ocean from up in the mountains. We passed through many small towns where people were selling their goods (prepared food, fruit, souvenirs, etc) on the sidewalks. We ended up stopping in one town that had a huge farmer's market on the way back to PV.

We finally reached San Blas and got off the bus. A woman came up and was selling fresh baked pineapple and banana muffins for virtually nothing. I bummed a couple of pesos off Kelly and bought a few. Wow, were they good! I saw a very skinny dog nearby and shared some of my muffin with it. I'm so used to our spoiled American dogs that I was expecting it to grab the piece of muffin and inhale it. Instead, it was very timid, came to me very slowly and with a gentleness that I've never seen in a dog, quietly took what I offered with her lips and backed away. I was stunned.

Before I had a chance to share any more goodies with my new friend, we were corralled over to a small dock where several boats were waiting. Kelly and I piled into the back row of the last boat. There were a lot of trees overhanging the water and it was nice to be outside and in the shade. We motored through some pretty thick groves of trees. Our boat driver had a really good eye and pointed out snakes, iguanas, birds and all kinds of exotic plants. We sailed under the cover of trees for a ways and then came out into open area. It made me think of the bayous of Louisiana in some spots and the Florida Everglades in others, only about 1000 degrees hotter. (Look at the last pic closely to see the two iguanas who tried to crap on our heads.) After cruising along for quite some time we reached what appeared to be the end of the line. We got off the boats and discovered that we were at the crocodile farm. There were several pens with all different numbers and sizes of crocodiles in them, including one pen that had a whole bunch a baby crocodiles in it. Since it was very hot out, never mind the fact that they're crocodiles, they don't move around a whole lot. One of the women in our tour group who was standing next to me apparently wasn't happy about this and threw a rock into one of the pens. I didn't know what she was hoping for - maybe that one of them would stand up and say "Hey, Lady. Please don't throw rocks at us." I couldn't believe how stupid she was. When I saw her reaching for another rock I very calmly and nicely told her that it would be much better if she did not throw any more rocks. In my mind I was also screaming "Because if you throw that rock, I'm going to throw your sorry ass into the pen right after it!" Fortunately for her (and her sorry ass), she put the rock down, but not before the tour guide noticed and said something to her too. As per usual, I became rather depressed wondering about how well these animals were really being taken care of and realizing that I had contributed to their exploitation by taking the tour. I decided to skip the stupid little lecture that was being given where I'm sure they try to justify the whole place with some asinine explanation. Instead, I wandered up an incline to a couple of large cages that were completely enclosed to see what was up there. Much to my exponentially increasing dismay, I came across two raccoons and several other animals that looked like a cross between a raccoon and a mongoose. Kelly has told me 100 times what they're called, but I can't seem to remember. They were in small cages with cement floors and nothing but a small box to go in. It was awful. Since I was helpless to do anything to get them out of there, I did what I could. I fed them my muffins. The raccoons came right over and stuck out their hands for everything they could get. The other animals weren't as dexterous, so I had to kind of throw the food in. I know that muffins probably weren't the best things to be feeding them, but they were made with fruit and were made fresh and locally so I knew there wouldn't be any preservatives in them. I didn't want to get in trouble for feeding them. I was talking out loud to the animals and telling them to stay quiet as if, even if they could understand, they might speak English. One of the gentleman from our tour, who apparently was bothered by the situation as well and had wandered over, overheard me and said "Go for it! I'll be your lookout." So I shared my bounty with the animals and made sure that every one of them got at least a little. I like to think that they understood and were grateful. One of them even shook my hand. I left there feeling that I had achieved my own little secret triumph. We reboarded the boats and started the long ride back. Since we had pointed, stopped and gawked at everything on the way in, it was nice to just sit back, relax and enjoy the breeze as we cruised back. One thing we saw that we didn't the first time through, was a small crocodile basking in the sun. It was great to see one in the wild and without chain link all around it. We were excited to have seen it and yet again aware of why the boat driver, who spoke virtually no English, could say very clearly "Please keep your hands in the boat." Once we reached the dock, we got right back on the buses and headed back to town for lunch. We made a brief side trip to an ancient fort overlooking San Blas. The view was spectacular. Our tour guide pointed out a huge inlet of water that he said is the world's largest shrimp farm. You can see it in the first pic below. I was able to see the ocean and a lighthouse from the fort, but they're very hard to see in the pictures. Kelly didn't even get off the bus so I had someone from the tour take my picture. You can see one of the ancient (and very rusty) cannons behind me. There wasn't a lot of info about the fort and I wish I knew more about it. We finally made it back to the restaurant for lunch. It was a small outdoor restaurant that was right on the beach. I had a piece of grilled chicken for the umpteenth time that week. After lunch, we had a little less than an hour to walk on the beach and go swimming if we wished. Kelly decided that she just wanted to get back on the air conditioned bus and read. So, I went off by myself and walked along the beach to collect shells. Our tour guide had said that it was a good place to collect them and he wasn't kidding. You couldn't walk on the beach without stepping on them. It was a constant "Crunch. Crunch. Crunch." from under my shoes. I walked a ways and gathered as many shells as I could fit into one hand. After I got back to the restaurant and cleaned up a bit, I got myself an orange popsicle. Let me tell you, after being in that sweltering heat and humidity for a whole week, frozen artificially flavored water never tasted so good. It's right up there with the best things about my vacation. We headed back to PV after our beach excursion. I started to talk with the gentleman sitting across the aisle from me named Pete. Turns out that he was the lookout when I was feeding the raccoons. He said that he was from Milwaukie and asked about the light rail train in Portland. I assumed he was from the suburb of Portland named Milwaukie since he knew about the train. So I asked if the was SW or SE (in relation to Portland). He looked at me a little funny and said, "Neither. Do you know where Chicago is?" Duh! He was from Milwaukee, Wisconsin! He probably thought I was a moron until I explained that there was a town in Oregon called Milwaukie with an 'i'. We talked pretty much the whole way back to PV which helped the time go by since it was quite a long drive (with traffic, it took almost 5 hours. Oy!). Turns out that he and his companion, Judy, were staying at the Buenaventura Hotel too. Once we got back to the hotel, we ran into them again at the pool and talked for a while more. Kelly and I had a late dinner at the hotel and finally, after a very looooong day, went to bed.

Wednesday was our final day in PV. Our flight was at 3:30 or so which left us a little time to spend in town. We hit the breakfast buffet one last time and then went to the Mercado to pick up just a few more things to bring back. Kelly had purchased a whole set of glassware and needed a bigger carry-on bag to get them home. I picked up one more shirt for Mr Moo and a colorful ceramic fish for my MIL. We took a cab back to the hotel, finished packing and went down to the pool for one last dip. I went up to the room to change and get our bags down to the lobby. I checked us out and paid the bill while Kelly changed her clothes. Then we waited for the shuttle to take us back to the airport. We started getting a little nervous once we realized that they were late in picking us up. Not that it would be a bad thing to be stuck in PV, but I think we both were pretty eager to get home and out of the humidity by that point. A rep from the tour company finally showed up and we were on our way.

On the way to the airport, he was asking us how our vacation was and making lots of small talk. I happened to mention my nightmare with the hotel keys and going back to El Eden for them. His reply: "Oh. That was YOU!" Apparently, I am now famous in PV as that stupid American woman who left her keys at El Eden and had to take a 280 peso taxi ride back to get them. Oy.

Our flight from PV to SF was fabulously empty. It was empty enough that everyone pretty much had a whole row to themselves. Kelly moved into the row behind me and I spread out. We were hoping that it would be like that to Portland too, but we weren't so lucky.

Once in SF, we had to go through customs. Since we didn't have any checked bags, we didn't have to fight the crowds at the carousels. I told Kelly I'd meet her on the other side and went darting through the crowd. Since I had been there the year before, I knew that the lines for US citizens were way off to the sides. So, I bypassed the giant traffic jam of people in the middle and found a fairly short line all the way on the end. As I got closer to the counter, I could see that the agent closest to us was having a bear of a time dealing with an elderly couple in wheelchairs who had a cart piled up to about the ceiling with luggage. How two elderly people in wheelchairs could possibly need that much luggage is beyond me. As I watched, I figured out that they didn't speak any English either. They gave the customs agent ID that apparently was not on the list as proper ID. The agent asked to see their tickets and the elderly man held up six fingers. Oh boy. I wasn't too worried because the agent on the other side was moving people right along. Then I noticed as the woman in front of me pulled her giant cart of stuff up to that agent that she had a cat with her. Ack! Live animals = eternity at the customs counter. When the agent leaned over and paged some special agent, I knew I had chosen the wrong line. No speaka da English on one side and incoming live animals on the other. I was about to curl up into a fetal position on the floor when the agent dealing with the elderly couple finally just gave up, stamped their IDs and sent them on their way. From the look on his face, I could tell that he was no longer having a good day. I peeked around the glass and said "Hi. I speak English and I promise all my papers are in order. Please don't kill me." That got a little smile out him and he realized that I had been following what had happened. He kind of rolled his eyes and said "Can you believe the crap people pull?" He seemed grateful to be able to just stamp my passport and move me along in about 15 seconds.

I met up with Kelly on the other side of customs as we planned and we re-boarded the plane. Unlike the flight to SF, the flight to Portland was packed. Fortunately, the flight wasn't nearly as long and we were back in the wonderful land of Oregon before we knew it.